I had a plan. I had a plan that consisted of various ‘pit stops’ to places I’d want to hang out and dance in on my New Year’s Eve. I was determined to get my inner Leyquisha out, yet 2017 came and as I drove home at 4:30AM, I got slapped with a good wake up call. Three days have passed and I still keep thinking about it. Let me explain:
I don’t hang out. Most of my friends call me a grandma, most automatically don’t include me in their invites to their night events knowingly that I won’t attend. I’m instantly isolated and that’s purely because I’m not the going out type, and my parents don’t want me out late. I’m twenty two and unlike most, my parents’ say still has an affect on my life.
Having the possibility to actually let go and go out, I chose to do so on New Year’s Eve with friends. We had a plan and we stuck to it. Did we end up sticking to the plan? Yes. Was is up to my expectations? No. Was it fun? No.
I wasn’t having fun. I didn’t like being squished at Funky Buddha which was the size of my living room – super small. It was impossible to move around, find an area to actually sit still and enjoy the music. This is a place people rage about being ‘amazing’ and ‘so much fun’ when it’s so overrated. I do not recommend.
I was tired and as I dropped my friend off at the end of the night, I realized it wasn’t the places I went to, since La Concha had the huge area (just horrible music) but it was me. I didn’t enjoy my night because of two things:
- I was with the wrong crowd. I chose the wrong people to spend my time with. New Year’s Eve is different for me – it’s special unlike for others.
- I didn’t enjoy it because I didn’t like it. Going out to bars, standing around and feeling down since let’s say no man checks you out or my drink was served after a long wait, aren’t the type of thoughts or problems I would want to think about or have.
I always blamed my parents for keeping me away from the night life, maybe hence why I know a limited amount of people in real life due to my lack of night life presence. Now, I don’t blame them. I acknowledge the fact that I don’t go out – I’d rather go to the gym, go to a lounge, relax, have coffee, etc.
I’m not ashamed. Society won’t break me and neither will it’s standards and expectations.
Happy New Year!