I have a headache while I write this because the topic itself gives me a headache – what an irony. A couple days ago, my best friend Nazanin urged me to download The Rules by Ellen Fein. “You’ll love it! You NEED to read it!” she said. Later, as I was scrolling down my Instagram feed, Mimi Ikonn, the representative of Luxy Hair, posted a photo of her new book on relationships. I don’t know whether the universe is hinting for me to read a book about love but I’m strongly declining every offer thrown at me. I don’t want rules that tell me how to act, how to text, love, and respond – *I just need loooooove* … just kidding.
I understand the idea of sharing what you think works for you however, I find it important to comprehend that the same method works differently for everyone – positively, negatively, or does nothing at all.
For example, I follow this Azerbaijani girl who lives in England, who makes these extremely wanna-be recognized YouTube videos (I’m not hating) and she wears black sneakers with an outfit that just doesn’t work HOWEVER what I find disgustingly ugly, she finds beautiful and vice versa. I see her doing pointless videos yet she might enjoy making them. What works for me, might not work for her. We’re two different individuals with two distinguished tastes.
Taste. We all speak about how everyone has different tastes and likes. Yet, when it comes to following ridiculous rules on how to date and act with men, women tend to follow it like a religion. Why do I have to follow someone else’s taste and what works for them, when I want to see what makes it worthy for myself? I don’t want to text a guy after a specific amount of time, pretending to be some oh so busy woman. I don’t want to read a book where an author refers to men as hunters – actually, I fucking want to hunt.I really don’t understand why Nazanin got offended when I called the book ‘stupid’. I realized that in a society like Azerbaijan, a book of how a woman should act is probably something that seems right. I know she’ll go on and on about how I’ve never had a boyfriend, how I’m too manly I don’t know how to flirt (the list goes on and on) yet all of those things make me who I am, why do I have to see it as a disability rather than something that makes me who I am today?
Am I going to read these books on love? No. Am I going to make decisions depending on what I think is right in given situation? Absolutely.