I have always heard people mention how they ‘delete’ people from their lives. The whole ‘you don’t need people who bring you down’ crap being repeated wherever a philosophical discussion goes down. Is it that easy? I mean, are we composed like computers that just do something with a click? A push of a button and there you go, a person is deleted. Permanently removed. On you go with your lives.
It’s not that easy, if you think about it. Every person we decide to let in, trust, and care about begin a wall-buildup. A wall which with every event gets built higher and becomes stronger. Built with trust, painted with emotions and yet, everyone thinks it’s so easy to break it all down. Truth be told – it’s not that easy. It’s not easy to let go of something that you’re attached to, even if you know it’s a bad influence or a bad addition to your life. Yet you wonder, even if I know it’s bad for me, why keep it? It’s the same as smoking cigarettes or drinking alcohol – I know it’s bad, yet I still do it.
I don’t smoke, Mom. Don’t worry. I’m just an alcoholic.
That didn’t come out right..I meant to say..
Forget what I wanted to say. Where were we?
All of us have been in a situation where we know we need to get out of – whether we’re being disrespected, deserve to be treated better, or we’re under bad influence. The reasons are our cigarettes, and even though we understand they’re not good, we still keep on taking a puff. It’s something one is used to, because how can someone break a wall down so suddenly, without hurting anyone? How can someone let go without leaving trace? That is, if one doesn’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings.
I’m talking about whether your friend, loved one, or even family treats you the way you know shouldn’t treat you. One might say that we all have common sense, we all know when one is in such situation, but that’s where the problem comes in. As mentioned above, we all might be aware of the conflict, yet sometimes we decide to let the waves calm, hoping things will change. It will get better.
The excuses you make up for yourself such as:
But…but I’ve known her all my life. She’s a good person at heart. It’s not her fault that after I met her, I began skipping class, smoking, drinking, and swearing. Might be her fault a little but still!
He said he loves me, I’m sure he’s just busy to not call or text me for a week.
Who cares he mentioned something inadequate and rude for the fiftieth time? He’s family, I can’t stay mad!
It’s silly when you read the above excuses, yet deep inside I know you remembered that excuse you told yourself to keep that person in your life. Don’t shake your head, I know you did. Yet, we understand we deserve better for our lives, however the excuses we keep telling ourselves begin to hover over our shoulders. On repeat. over and over.
Then that day will come and you’ll tell yourself that you’ve had enough. You might put your foot down and begin your cleanse. The cleanse of negativity as some might call it. Juice cleanses are so yesterday, do the 7-day negativity cleanse. Mainstreamin’.
You might completely just stop talking to that person, deleting their number and do the unfollow move from everywhere (Ah you little social-media bitch!) Everyone is different regarding how to put their foot down and saying stop. If it’s a friendship and you understand the harm, it’s probably best to slowly disconnect yourself, slowly taking off the bricks from the wall built. Likewise, if it’s a relationship (craptionship – get it?), the more a person holds off the cut-off, the harder it is. My advice is to cut it off completely. It’s easier in that sense. No more buts, ifs or anything of that matter. As my best friend usually tells me “grow some balls and get shit done” (no offence). I guess my point is, different occasions have different ways of handling things. In all matters, keeping your space and being a little distant is always the right way in any case possible.
Or, you might never get to that stage where you know you have to say no. It all depends on the person or the situation one is in, in a sense. Maybe you know of someone who’s in a similar situation – show them this, they might come to their senses. Hopefully. #PreachLeylaPreach
I guess we aren’t built like computers. We have feelings and we worry ahead of time. Unlike computers, it takes us awhile to get to the point where we say stop. We’re like the slow internet type of computers where the video never loads and the annoying circling object never stops moving. We’re humans who sometimes are stupid enough to accept the negativity they receive or live in. That’s the truth.
So, be smart. Restart your life in order to have the newest iOS update. Remove the negativity and come to your senses. Do the cleansing and see results right away. Just like advertised. Pinky Promise.
I’m doing it, you should too.